With the Super Bowl coming up, I thought it only fair to give a little love to America's favorite past time. I have to say, I'm not big on Pro Football, but give me a good college bowl game and I'm sold. Must have something to do with my Texas heritage. (Hook 'em!) There's also something quite nice about Men being Manly, running around sweating and grunting in extremely tight stretchy pants... hmm. yes... yes, I think I might have nailed it there.
Ahem. So. The reality is, I don't actually want to talk about football, per se... but I do really dig that analogy and funny wordplay, so indulge me if you will. I want to talk about receiving. And how we ladies often have the notion that our job and sole purpose in life is all about the opposite of receiving. Which is giving. And don't get me wrong- giving is great. Super super good. But, we ladies tend to give until there ain't nothin' left to be got. And that, my dearest honeybees, well... that sh*t 'll kill ya.
I know you're thinking, "aww, c'mon LV, isn't that a bit drastic? 'Kill' me? Really?" To which I would reply "Yep. Fo reals."
Seriously though– as women, our nature thrives best on a delicate balance of feminine and masculine energies. The masculine is all about action, getting it done, providing and protecting. Sound like familiar attributes in your daily routine? Yes, that's because our society and culture is imbued in the masculine– favoring and cultivating this energy. What we've failed to acknowledge is the stark imbalance due to the suppression of the feminine energy. The feminine is all about - you guessed it - receiving. It's also about allowing, softness, compassion, beauty. We need both the masculine and the feminine to be truly healthy, fulfilled, happy. And as women, we are sacrificing our gift by incessantly giving and never stopping to replenish ourselves. We need to make a better choice.
To put it in football terms– which position sounds better to you?:
The Wide Receiver, shining and confident in her awesomeness, allowing all the goodies to come to her, and feeling great about giving away the surplus goodies since she's inundated and overflowing with them?
The Tight End (aka Tight A**) who gives and gives and gives and gives and then becomes overly cranky, tired and resentful because she's done all this work and has nothing to show for it?
I'm putting my money on the Wide Receiver personally... just sounds like a way better deal. Now, if we choose that position though, here's the rub– it's freakin' hard. It's hard to go against what we know- habits of giving until we're blue and then turning into a sad nasty mess of contrite snottiness. It's going to take eternal vigilance my sweet lovelies... but I swear it'll be worth it.
How to begin, you ask?
Step One: Set an intention.
"I intend to be the receiver of all good righteous and aligned things."
Step Two: Give thanks. Like you already got all the goodies.
"Thank you (God, Creator, Sacred Oneness, All that Is) for all this goodness." "More please."
Step Three: Start Small.
Accept a compliment - saying Thank You instead of shirking it off like you don't deserve it.
Allow someone to hold the door for you or pick up your tab. Thank them graciously.
Write down your desires in a list. Allow it to be seen by your husband/ boyfriend/ girlfriend/ friend friend.
Step Four: Get clear about your limits.
If you feel like you're starting to stretch beyond your means, say No. Cancel a date. Take a date with yourself. I'm serious.
Step Five: Enjoy it! Relax and allow, and know you are worth it.
This may be the hardest step. My alternate title to this post is "The Bold Act of Receiving." That's no joke. It takes some serious courage to stand in your glory and know you are worthy to receive wondrous things. No worries, we'll touch on this a lot more later. It's a big one. For now, do your best. Breathe.
Have fun with that! Let me know how it goes. Hut Hut!
Oh, one more thing– I would like to note that I have taken extensive liberties with the actual football definitions of both Wide Receiver and Tight End, as it were. But of course we all know that in the game of football, the Tight End is a highly versatile player, of stockier build than the WR, capable of offensive tackle and pass receiving, while the Wide Receiver is lean and fast, built almost solely for receiving passes. In effect, one could argue that more often than not, the Wide Receiver has a much tighter end than the Tight End. And in those tiny pants, I have absolutely no problem with that. Whatsoever.